{"id":13707,"date":"2012-05-22T21:02:36","date_gmt":"2012-05-22T13:02:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/?p=13707"},"modified":"2023-04-26T00:09:25","modified_gmt":"2023-04-25T16:09:25","slug":"worst-web-designer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/worst-web-designer\/","title":{"rendered":"13 Steps to Being the Worst Web Designer on the Planet"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>That\u2019s new\u2026 Since there\u2019s so much information on how to do <em>this<\/em> well and <em>that<\/em> exceptionally well, I\u2019ve decided to go the other way and tell you how to be the worst (freelance) web designer on the planet.<\/p>\n<p>But why? Just because! That\u2019s why. BUT\u2026 being truly bad is not that easy, though. Thankfully, there are things you can do that can get you all set up for failure. Here goes.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Note:<\/strong> <em>Just to be clear, as I value my freedom, this is pure entertainment. If you put any of these into practice, you will crash and burn, get sued, or most likely go to jail.<\/em> Love, Karol<\/p>\n<div class=\"ref-block ref-block--post\" id=\"ref-post-1\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/11-common-mistakes-blunders-in-web-design\/\" class=\"ref-block__link\" title=\"Read More: 10 Common Web Design Mistakes (Blunders)\" rel=\"bookmark\"><span class=\"screen-reader-text\">10 Common Web Design Mistakes (Blunders)<\/span><\/a>\n<div class=\"ref-block__thumbnail img-thumb img-thumb--jumbo\" data-img='{ \"src\" : \"https:\/\/assets.hongkiat.com\/uploads\/thumbs\/250x160\/11-common-mistakes-blunders-in-web-design.jpg\" }'>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<noscript>\n<style>.no-js #ref-block-post-6333 .ref-block__thumbnail { background-image: url(\"https:\/\/assets.hongkiat.com\/uploads\/thumbs\/250x160\/11-common-mistakes-blunders-in-web-design.jpg\"); }<\/style>\n<\/noscript>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n<div class=\"ref-block__summary\">\n<h4 class=\"ref-title\">10 Common Web Design Mistakes (Blunders)<\/h4>\n<p class=\"ref-description\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\tThere are tons of website on the Internet, and hundreds or probably thousands are created by day. Here's...\t\t\t\t\t\t<span>Read more<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<h2>1. 50% Advance Payment, Then Procrastinate<\/h2>\n<p>This is the first trick in a doomed-to-fail web designer\u2019s guidebook. Of course, you don\u2019t actually admit that you\u2019re not doing any work. You cover this up by making things up, i.e. <em>lying<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>How?<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s easy: just say that you\u2019re doing some activities that won\u2019t produce any <em>tangible<\/em> results. Like, \u201cI\u2019m working on the main idea for the logo\u201d or \u201cI\u2019m analyzing the field\u201d or \u201cI\u2019m preparing all the initial requirements.\u201d You know, stuff like that.<\/p>\n<p>But of course, you actually do none of these things. Don\u2019t worry, you\u2019ll be able to craft something great during the final week. So the client will love you anyway. You may even get a bonus for your dedicated work.<\/p>\n<p>You know what? As a matter of fact\u2026<\/p>\n<h2>2. Forget About Deadlines Altogether<\/h2>\n<p>Clients don\u2019t care about deadlines. Remember, as long as you give them something nice and shiny, it doesn\u2019t have to be delivered on time.<\/p>\n<p>Chances are that your client doesn\u2019t have any campaigns or promotions set up in advance. There may be no media coverage, interviews, or partners ready to spread the word about their new project. People don\u2019t know about these things, so it\u2019s cool.<\/p>\n<h2>3. Get Only Pirated Software<\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/free-code-editors-reviewed\/\">Software is expensive<\/a>, especially for a web designer. Developers, they have it cheap. WordPress \u2014 free. An environment to edit some PHP code \u2014 free. Simple local server to test the site they\u2019re developing \u2014 free.<\/p>\n<figure><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.hongkiat.com\/uploads\/being-the-worst-web-designer\/the-pirate-bay.jpg\" alt=\"The Pirate Bay\" width=\"500\" height=\"312\"><\/figure>\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text su-image-caption\" data-url=\"\" data-target=\"self\" style=\"min-height:34px;padding-left:36px;color:#333333\">\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text-icon\" style=\"color:#333333;font-size:24px;width:24px;height:24px\"><i class=\"sui sui-photo\" style=\"font-size:24px;color:#333333\"><\/i><\/div>\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text-content su-u-trim\" style=\"color:#333333\">Image source: <a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.redbubble.com\/i\/t-shirt\/Geek-Hand-Sign-by-rubyred\/3288446.88ZX2\">Airborne Gamer<\/a><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear:both;height:0\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Web designers, on the other hand, have many tools at their disposal such as Photoshop, Illustrator, 3ds Max, Corel, stock pictures, and a good LCD screen to see all the colors properly. Unfortunately, these tools can be quite expensive. Fortunately, there are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/11-free-alternatives-softwares-to-adobe-photoshop\/\">free alternatives<\/a> available.<\/p>\n<p>However, some people choose to use <em>thepiratebay<\/em> to download software illegally. This is not recommended as it is against the law and can result in serious consequences. It is better to use legal and ethical means to obtain the necessary tools for web design.<\/p>\n<h2>4. Chuck Modern Trends Out the Window<\/h2>\n<p>Come on, you don\u2019t need to be up-to-date with <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/web-design-trend-2012\/\">modern trends<\/a> because you are the one setting the trends. You are the Paris Hilton of web design. You don\u2019t need to know what others are doing; it\u2019s irrelevant. They need to learn from you, not the other way around.<\/p>\n<h2>5. Let Them Adapt to You<\/h2>\n<p>This is not your problem. You\u2019re just an <em>awesome<\/em> designer. If a platform like WordPress can\u2019t handle your mega flashy great design, then it\u2019s the platform\u2019s fault, not yours.<\/p>\n<p>Your client will certainly understand this fact and invest in a custom-made platform that will be able to handle your superb creation.<\/p>\n<h2>6. Don\u2019t Set Goals for Your Projects<\/h2>\n<p>A goal is something that everyone worships far too much. Why do websites even need goals? They are just websites \u2014 pieces of great design that should be kept in a gallery for people to rave about.<\/p>\n<p>There is no other goal for a website than to look good. Websites set up to make money? Meh, you\u2019re an artist, not an evil marketer.<\/p>\n<p>A beautiful design is what every client wants. They simply want to show the site to their spouse and say \u201c<em>Look, honey, isn\u2019t she a beauty? I paid $10,000 for this, it was surely worth it!<\/em>\u201c<\/p>\n<p>Which brings me to\u2026<\/p>\n<h2>7. Overcharging<\/h2>\n<p>Here\u2019s how to put a price tag on your project:<\/p>\n<p>First, set your hourly rate. Try to be honest and think of a rate that sounds reasonable in your field. Done? Okay, now take this rate and multiply it by 2.<\/p>\n<p>Next, look at the project you have to do and try to estimate the time it will take if you were to do some actual honest work. Done? Okay, now take that estimate and multiply it by 2 as well.<\/p>\n<p>Now that you have your two numbers, multiply one by the other and you have a nice price tag. The final step is to take this price tag and multiply it by 1.5. We can call this a \u201csafety ratio\u201d. And there you have it, your final price.<\/p>\n<h2>8. Don\u2019t Sign a Contract<\/h2>\n<p>You don\u2019t need those. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/writing-freelance-documents-tips-and-guidelines\/\">Contracts<\/a> hold you accountable. You know, people can sue you if you fail to deliver.<\/p>\n<figure><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.hongkiat.com\/uploads\/being-the-worst-web-designer\/contract-signing.jpg\" alt=\"Contract\" width=\"500\" height=\"332\"><\/figure>\n<p>\u201cBut isn\u2019t this risky? The client might not pay me at all even if I don\u2019t fail!\u201d I hear you say.<\/p>\n<p>Nah, don\u2019t worry. Look, just a minute ago you\u2019ve crafted your price tag to be at least 6 times the amount that can be considered honest. Additionally, you\u2019re asking for 50% of the money upfront. In the worst case scenario, you still end up with half of what should be getting.<\/p>\n<p>Of course, if something goes wrong you don\u2019t have to give it back because *ba dum tsss* there\u2019s no contract.<\/p>\n<h2>9. Always Laugh Off Your Client\u2019s Previous Site<\/h2>\n<p>Remember, you are the expert. You know best. There\u2019s no better way to show it than by laughing at other people\u2019s work.<\/p>\n<p>Just point randomly at some elements of the previous design and say some completely irrelevant things about how you could have easily made them better. For example: \u201cThis logo is completely invisible. I would make it much bigger,\u201d or \u201cThis color is terrible. I would use something that focuses more attention on the site\u2019s content,\u201d and so on.<\/p>\n<p>Also, use a lot of smart expressions when talking about the site, such as \u201csocial media exposure\u201d or \u201cusable and error-free HTML structure.\u201d It helps. True story.<\/p>\n<h2>10. Use Comic Sans<\/h2>\n<p>I know that those hipster designers hate Comic Sans, but this is exactly why you \u2013 a superior creature \u2013 should love it.<\/p>\n<figure><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.hongkiat.com\/uploads\/being-the-worst-web-designer\/comic-sans.jpg\" alt=\"Comic Sans\" width=\"500\" height=\"373\"><\/figure>\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text su-image-caption\" data-url=\"\" data-target=\"self\" style=\"min-height:34px;padding-left:36px;color:#333333\">\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text-icon\" style=\"color:#333333;font-size:24px;width:24px;height:24px\"><i class=\"sui sui-photo\" style=\"font-size:24px;color:#333333\"><\/i><\/div>\n<div class=\"sue-icon-text-content su-u-trim\" style=\"color:#333333\">Image source: <a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/comicsansproject.tumblr.com\/\">Comic Sans Project<\/a><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear:both;height:0\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Comic Sans is mainstream. Clients love mainstream fonts. Besides, the font is friendly, playful, and has a heartwarming vibe to it. It makes people say \u201coooohh\u201d like they just saw a kitten.<\/p>\n<h2>11. Do the Actual Work<\/h2>\n<p>Yea, whatever. Doesn\u2019t matter.<\/p>\n<h2>12. Don\u2019t Listen to Feedback<\/h2>\n<p>Listening to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hongkiat.com\/blog\/7-steps-to-better-website-feedback\/\">Feedback<\/a>, and more dangerously(!), changing something according to this feedback, is a sign of weakness.<\/p>\n<p>Every web designer\u2019s essential skill is the ability to protect their work. You need to present a firm position and explain why your design is the best design any human being could create. Speak quickly with massive self-confidence.<\/p>\n<p>If someone points out anything they don\u2019t like about your creation, respond assertively and tell them why they\u2019re wrong.<\/p>\n<p>Something along the lines of: \u201cThat\u2019s why you\u2019re paying me to design this, not the other way around,\u201d tends to work just fine.<\/p>\n<h2>13. Don\u2019t Provide Support<\/h2>\n<p>If there is a problem with your design (and you have already received 100% of the payment), do not bother answering phone calls, emails, or any other form of communication thereafter.<\/p>\n<p>If your previous client requests some work to be done for free because it was not done properly in the first place, then act as if you are unavailable, no longer designing, or use any other excuse that will save you from doing any work at all.<\/p>\n<p>If your client asks for further paid work, on the other hand, be there and willing to help. Of course, you can charge a fair amount for your services, but do not overcharge just because the client has no other options.<\/p>\n<p>Freelance web design is truly a great business to be in.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 Switching back to reality \u2014<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Have you ever met such a designer? Feel free to comment and let me know what you think about this \u201creverse\u201d web design tutorial. :)<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>That\u2019s new\u2026 Since there\u2019s so much information on how to do this well and that exceptionally well, I\u2019ve decided to go the other way and tell you how to be the worst (freelance) web designer on the planet. But why? Just because! That\u2019s why. BUT\u2026 being truly bad is not that easy, though. Thankfully, there&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":27,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[352],"tags":[3380,510],"topic":[4520],"class_list":["entry-content","is-maxi"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v22.8 (Yoast SEO v27.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>13 Steps to Being the Worst Web Designer on the Planet - Hongkiat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"That&#039;s new... 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